When the client is not grounded

Home Blog TIPS ON ARTFUL COACHING When the client is not grounded
When the client is not grounded

The chime of an incoming Zoom call echoed through my coaching space, and as I accepted the connection, Jim’s face appeared on the screen, a canvas of hurried movements and turbulent emotions.

  • Hey, Jim. How are you today?” I greeted, trying to set a calm tone.
  • Hey, sorry I’m a bit late“, he blurted out, his words tumbling like rocks down a hill. “It’s been one of those days, you know? Non-stop chaos.”
  • No worries, Jim. Take a deep breath and settle in. This is your time“, I replied, trying to convey a sense of calmness through the digital medium.
  • Alright, so, everything’s just piling up. Work is a mess, personal stuff is a mess – it’s like I can’t catch a break.

Jim exhaled audibly, attempting to shake off the tension in his shoulders. I observed the agitated energy in his gestures, the way his hands moved in a flurry of frustration. I decided to remain still, allowing him the space to unload the weight of his day. I encouraged him to start. 

He began recounting his day, the story pouring out with an urgency that mirrored his entrance. Work deadlines, a challenging project, personal issues – it was a chaotic tapestry of stress. As he spoke, I focused on being a silent presence, acknowledging his words and observing the unspoken language in the way he shifted uncomfortably in his chair.

  • What can be useful for us to focus on today, Jim?

As he delved into the details, I continued to observe – the subtle changes in his expressions, the moments of contemplation, and the occasional flashes of realisation. Zoom can be an intimate medium, capturing nuances that might be overlooked in a face-to-face encounter.

The virtual space transformed into a cocoon of introspection and Jim used the whole session to slow down and be finally still. By the end of our session, his energy had changed. The lines of tension softened. The unfinished business had found a path forward.

As we signed off, I couldn’t help but reflect on the power of “arriving still” to a coaching session! 

It was not a pattern for Jim, but I have met other clients who brought this hurried energy into our sessions every time… It seemed as if living in a perpetual state of rush had become a way of life for them. And I wonder if this constant rush might be impacting their overall well-being! 

With these clients I like to share that the way we both show up to a coaching session can set the tone for the entire conversation. 

It might influence the way they process information, make decisions, their presence and ultimately the depth of the work we can do together. I like to explore the idea of being intentional about how we both prepare for our future sessions.

As part of our coaching journey, we work collaboratively to find practical strategies to create intentional and mindful transitions into our sessions. This could involve taking a few minutes before the session to centre themselves, perhaps through mindfulness exercises, deep breathing, or a brief reflection on their progress. We can do it together, if they prefer. 

Addressing the habitual rush becomes a crucial aspect of our coaching conversations. It allows clients to recognise the connection between their state of mind and the outcomes they sought. By bringing a centred and more focused mindset to their coaching experience, ultimately leading to more profound insights and meaningful progress in their personal and professional lives.

You are invited to join our FREE ‘Coaching Dojo’ to practice in a safe space and get feedback on your skills from an ICF MCC certified mentor coach.

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